Reaching Out

Have you heard of the expat-blues syndrome? All expatriates experienced displacement, the roller coaster ride of fun and misery, alienation; a mixture of incorrect dosage of the above is more than potent. It started as a syndrome, then all of a sudden it's a condition.

One expat friend said to me, "You're busy with work, and you get comfortable with the small group of people you have and you don't really put effort into making friends. You hang out with the same people, most of them as foreign to the place as you are, and you just keep to what you know. Now you're all gone... and suddenly, I'm in the same place I was when I first came in this country. I thought I'm done with the blues." She shrugged and let out a long sigh.

Why is that the older we are the harder it is to make new friends? What is about adulthood that prevents us from connecting to other people? Imagine if reaching out to fulfill our need is already that difficult, what about reaching out to help other people? Is true that we lose our innocence as we add years to our lives; and therefore grow more distrust in the human race? Do we fight less for our need to connect with others, because we simply... can't be bothered?
Even if I don't think that I have the condition, I'm determined to shake off the expat-blues syndrome. I'm determined to actively pursuing a remedy.

Tonight, as I walked out of my building, my fingers dialled a number. A new acquaintance who turned out to be free for dinner. There we were; two strangers with little knowledge of each other trying to find a common ground. Tonight I learned that he has family responsibilities, younger siblings. I discovered that he would love to travel someday. I'm not sure what he learned about me, but hopefully he's interested in knowing the bits he didn't get to find out.