All About Food

What is it about chinese Indonesian and food? To celebrate my grandmother's 92nd birthday, my auntie threw a little lunch gathering for our extended family. My auntie invited her cousins; all aunties and uncles I have never really known were there, deeply engaged in jovial conversation about traditional food they used to eat when they were children. I sat politely in the corner, as a representative of my generation, trying to follow the dialogues that happen in mix street Javanese and Indonesian.

My dad's family came from a small town in central java, and his cousins all lived in neighbouring towns. As chinese Indonesians, their taste buds grew with the mixture of local (read: Javanese fondness of everything sweet) and home cooking. They shared the same love for food, traditional tahu telor, bakmi jawa, mie tek tek, urap, asem asem jawa, lo mie, kepiting tarakan, lotek, and many other things I never knew. They spoke longingly of vegetables that had dissapeared, only to have one auntie said, "Hey... I could find that in a market near my house!" In which the conversation shifted to comparing markets in different parts of Jakarta. There were talks of shiitake, soft shell crabs, watercrest lettuce, different type of noodles... My parents' generation not only know how to enjoy food, but also prepare the best dishes to suit the tongue. This generation is fluent in many aspects of food because it is such an integral part of life. They; and I, too for that matter, would not know how to live otherwise.

At a different gathering last night, my friend's German husband fondly told me that he was slowly learning to understand his wife's love for food. His Indonesian words vocabulary currently consist of words like fish, chicken, pork, beef, vegetables, soup, crackers to name a few. He said that whenever there was more than 3-4 people hanging out, food would definitely be a topic, and of course no event is complete without eating. As we were talking about that, his mother in law walked past with a big plate of Ayam Bulungan. See??

I began to wonder, what would my cousins and I talk about 20 years from now. When we have a similar gathering to cath up on lost times, would we speak longingly about the food of our generation? Would we speak about food preparation also? Or would we be talking about restaurants instead because we no longer cook?

My mouth goes watery just writing about this. I want soft shell crab crumbles in my hand as it caresses my mouth before it goes into my stomach. Yummm...

The False Notion of Seclusion

The last few times I went away to have a break were spent in a tranquil place where not a lot happened. It is a form of retreat; where I escape the hustle and bustle of work, play, family, friends, responsibilities, obligations. It was time to surrender to moments of the day, to have no plans and do as one felt on that fleeting moment. I would often try to write, to reflect and most of the time, try to not do anything at all. The destinations were carefully picked to ensure privacy; where chances of meeting people you know were slimmed down to none.

I was sure that the above things were also in the heads of the couple staying in a unit below my room. The room was secluded and private (... so much so that even a private pool was provided), after all they must have paid a hefty price for this convenience. They took advantage of it, of course... not realising that on one lovely afternoon, a girl just happened to raise her neck a little too high above the pool to accidently take part in their privacy. I stayed quiet, held back my laughter inside and frantically invited my friend to quickly jumped in the pool to share the experience. The couple was just talking to each other in their pool. Stark naked.

At breakfast the next day, one friend suddenly realised that another couple was a friend of another friend. It seemed to bother him that in this remote place on another side of the ocean, somebody knew who he was. I don't know how much it bothers him because we didn't talk about it again.

That goes to say that one can only attempt to protect oneself from other people; from meeting people you know and who knows you; we often let our guard down thinking that for once we are completely safe. That we can just be ourselves for the world to see. After all, isn't that why we go on to these retreats? To spend invaluable times with our inner self, and not be bothered with the various faces we need to put on as we carefully tread our daily lives? At the end of it, we would never know. As my friend and I lowered our necks and talked about our voyeuristic experience, we also appreciate the blissfulness of not knowing (...or them not knowing). That like the couples below, we try and do our best to not care, to enjoy the moments as they are and embrace the unexpected they bring.

Thanks BB for the title!

A good whole of nothing

A few days off. A few days under the scorching sun, where the heat burns you while the wind caresses your face. A few lazy days spent between the pool, the sea and the bed. A few days filled with fulfilling nothingness. Damn. I didn't want to go home.

Techno Love

Technological advances inevitably change the way we live. Gone are the days of letters, telegrams, journals, where waiting and anticipating were half of the fun. The value of time is increased to the nano second. No time should be wasted in waiting for the other person to tell you what he or she is thinking in writing. Text message service, emails, blackberry, push email replaced pull email. Skype eliminates traditional nation states boundaries, everyone is just a phone call away. Soon, time difference would become a concept irrelevant to our current ways of life.

How does this affect how we relate to other people? How is the modern relationship is shaped by technology? Interestingly enough, two of my close friends are on long distance relationships. Totally unplanned for; cross states, cross continent. I gave a long sigh when I heard about this. As happy as I am for them, I know that serious hard work is waiting for them.

LA-C had a few days of "technological-break-down-day" (... where every piece of technology you touch breaks down, hangs or simply won't work) trying to talk to J. Just to talk to him requires super effort on her behalf, mainly due to reasons she can't explain. She relies heavily on technology to keep the communication between them. Because you can't be talking on the phone forever, she must learn to be a good writer (... that, she naturally is...), to communicate her feelings and emotions, to light the words of her emails with passion and excitement.

VC-C learnt that the guy she is seeing is not a good communicator when not in person. Communication technology becomes useless. She would find disjointed words, and ignorance over the blackberry. But every time they see each other, magic happens and that keeps her going. It gives her a reason to take a chance.

I think in essence technology opens up new possibilities for people to be together. It doesn't always make it easier; love and relationship never is, but it can be the next best thing. It can help to make the relationship interesting. You can show the other person your bedroom. You can hear and see them at the same time. There's a sense of immediacy about it that helps a lot.

Excuse this post. It doesn't actually answer anything at all. Just a little insight of my current state of mine. Messy. I'm going to bed.