I never thought that I'd experience the cliche 'older and wiser' first hand. The last time I moved to a different country, it took me two years to learn about acceptance in order to function better. This time, it only took me 4 weeks before submitting to the reality that life is going to be different in Singapore. I am creating a home for myself; a current sanctuary of fluoro lights that need to be replaced, a living space that needs to be filled, but most importantly a soul that craves for change.
We live a life full of contradiction. I said that I'm hungry for change, but at the same I hate the loneliness that comes with it. I said that I realised that life is going to be different, but I wish that my friends are still as close to me as before. We live in a constant pull of what the heart wants, what the head knows and what the reality is. It is what makes it interesting and excruciating.
But it does get better. Acceptance brings about a certain calmness about the new things around you, the scent of the unfamiliar, the harshness of the new. Most importantly, it kinda makes fear your best friend. I'm getting to know my new best friend; we're getting along okay so far. So yeah, things do get better.
15 years ago
2 comments:
i hear ya. i think wisdom comes with age and experience, but A LOT of the wisdom is just realizing that you dont want to deal with (or create) various bullshit in your life (stupid worries, insecurities, pressures, expectations, etc). maybe thats why i hear a lot of ppl sat that someone who has been married once (and divorced) is so much easier to date--there a lot less bullshit cuz they know what they want, they know what works for them and what doesnt...
baca komen temen loe...
gw jadi ngenes yah....berharap hidup gw jadi so much easier....
eee....sekarang ini kok gw malah kembali ke segala ke-bullshit-an itu..
hehe..curahan hati nih kaya'nya....
butuh tarot lagi nih gw....HAHAHA!!
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