Godspeed

Do you think I'm lost?
For as long as I've lived, I've always had people telling me what to do. I spent half my life trying to please my mother, and then another decade to please the man I love. I have never pleased myself. I don't know how. All this time, I never knew how to please myself without pleasing others. Is that even possible? It is a concept that is alien to me. Now that the man I loved is no longer in the picture, I'm struggling to not let my mother back in.

I need to know myself. I want to know what I want. I want to know if it is too late to change. I want to do things that are part of who I am. Whoever this person is. I thought I knew what I liked, but maybe I made them up because they would benefit the person I was trying to please. Now, I questioned everything.

I forgot to tell you this the other night. I think you should get lost whilst traveling. It has a funny way to lead you to the path of where you should be, and introducing you to the hidden you's inside. Godspeed.