Airport

Generally I love airports; or rather the idea of what the place brings. It is a connecting point for air travel and if I'm there it can only mean one thing. I'm traveling again. There can't be anything wrong with it because generally it means going to a new place, or simply someplace else. A change of scenery. That can only be a good thing.

For the next few weeks this blog will be filled with stories from the American coast as I made my way from the sunshine coast of California to scenic Canada and back into the cosmopolitan New York. It will be the Jakarta's girl tale into the crazy world of uncle Sam and you know what, despite my dislike for USA.. I'm very very very excited.

Airport does that to me. Travel gives me the butterflies in my stomach.

A few hours of fame

I was a celebrity for a few hours yesterday. At least I got to learn about what those celebrities feel like when flash lights and journalists bug you for a never ending photo-op and interview requests. Ha! That wasn't fun at all. It was for a book launch and we were 2 nobodys and yet the media was doing their job.

My friends were teasing me about being a famous author and a celebrity and stuff. Thwy do that because they knew that it would get to me. They know how much I despise these 'celebrities' and their moments of fame; of how often people received credits not because of their work but because of their looks. Not to say that we have the looks, but one of the reason why I wanted yesterday's event to be low key was because of that. I was afraid that the marketing hype created over the book clouds the actual work (even if the work isn't THAT fantastic). It's just my first work and I didn't want to scream about it...

Maybe it was the fear of being shunned and abused because the work is crap. Maybe it was the fear that people will see me differently because of what I write. Maybe I'm scared that I will be seen as less of the person that I am. Alas, all is out there. Someone once told me that an artist has to learn to part with his work when the time comes. That time was yesterday.

It felt good when the whole thing was over. It felt better knowing that I only have two more days in this town before I leave for North America. My co-author will have to deal with more press while I'm gone. That feels good. I don't like that celebrity treatment. Maybe I'm just lacking that star quality... but, yeah this feels good. It feels right.

I still haven't found what I'm looking for...

I stopped blogging for a while. I'm leaving my current employment to embark on another path of unknowing. Some people asked me what is it that I'm looking for and why this restlessness goes on and on. It was the same month one year ago that I terminated another employment. Like U2 said, "I still haven't found what I'm looking for."

Believe it or not, it is not as aimless as it seems. Life showed me emotions I didn't know I have in the last 6 months. I learned to be angry and to care only to have to learn to forgive and forget. I can't remember the last time I felt such strongly about things. I'm used to indifference. I hate to see the people around me endure misery, and I wish I have the energy to stick around and see things through but I need to move on.

For those I've worked with the last few months, you've been an important part of my life and despite everything that happened you guys rock!!

I've moved on...again...

You think you know someone. You don't. You think that person is an open book. He/she is not. Life's one of many great mysteries is the fact that nothing is ever what it seems. It's all about figuring things out. In the process, one will bound to experience many different emotions; anger, dissapointment, shock, horror until the feelings subside and then yeah, nothing left. Moving right along...

Somebody told me earlier that everything will be okay, and that soon everything will be over. Ha! Isn't it good to know that things are actually over? And that you're about to embark on a new adventure? Yep. Just something new. Anything.

Saturday Night

Dinner. A Movie. What a typical saturday night out for two people. Problem is, I haven't had that for a while. Strange.